Losing first. Finding later.

by Monday, December 22, 2014

I keep hearing people say – “you gotta find yourself”. You know like – “Go out into the world and find yourself”.

But I was just thinking about this today, and realized this – where is the ‘finding’ going to happen, if there is no ‘losing’ going on at all?

Yes, part of the reason behind being born and being alive and sent here to live out this journey of life is to find yourself.

But first, you have to lose yourself.


What do I mean when I say “lose yourself”?

Well, it just sort of occurred to me that the times I feel most creative, the most full, the most overflowing, is when I have somewhere, somehow lost my way. It’s that point where I lost myself… and then these strong urges rise on the inside that make me want to clamour my way out of that lost feeling.

I could be emotionally lost not knowing what I was doing to certain relationships in my life, and what was it that I wanted for the present or the future.

It could be that I was feeling professionally lost and confused about where I am and where I see myself going…

It could be just life in general, where I sometimes feel like I’m so caught up in the daily dos-donts-haves-havenots-musts-mustnots that I feel an avalanche of thoughts, feelings, emotions through me.

It’s at these moments of feeling utterly lost, that I find myself. I dwell, I ponder, and finally…I am able to create and manifest something that I didn’t know I had inside me. Maybe a letter, maybe a post on my blog, maybe a painting, maybe an entry in my journal, maybe just a good, soul-impacting conversation with another human being.

And in that process of ‘creation’, I find myself. I discover things about me that I didn’t realize were there. Thoughts, ideas, desires, feelings of inspiration, and most importantly, a strange sense of being free.

So I know I haven’t said anything new above. People have talked about the “lose yourself to find yourself” theory before me. But what I’m really pondering over right now is WHY does the word “losing” then have this very negative connotation attached to it? Why don’t we ever question these notions that have been planted so firmly in our minds?

I say – ‘Losing’ is not a negative thing.

Losing yourself takes you closer to finding yourself.

Losing in life gives your invaluable lessons.

Losing in sport teaches you sportsmanship.

Losing in battle strengthens you as a warrior.

Losing in love prepares you better for the one.

When you ‘lose’, you find. When you find, you realize. And when you realize, you live. Really live.


So today I promise myself that I’m not going to be afraid of ‘losing’. : )

Until next time – keep Being Awesome and keep losing yourself.


2 Responses
  • jai
    December 23, 2014

    lose some money and you will find a friend for life 😛
    what a point miss Sardar! a point worth pondering over. 🙂

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